Thursday, October 22, 2009

Back to the Basics

Good morning everyone.  I am writing to you again to say that I am having to go back to the basics.  It seems that becoming healthy is not going to be an easy path for me.  As I told you before I went to the GI doctor and he gave me a medicine that seemed to have helped.  Well it did help but not for everything.  No more all day nausea and no more pain but the weekly stomach aches are still here.  So this week at the insistence of my loving husband (and when I say insistence I mean verbal reminders, email reminders and then as a last ditch effort yesterday two reminders that popped up on my phone!) I once again called my GI doctor. 

The GI doctor agrees something is still wrong and gives me another medication to try along with the first one.  Now let me tell you I am starting up quite a collection of medications.  I am up to 5 pills in the morning and 3 pills at night - fun stuff everyone!  So I picked it up yesterday and started taking it last night.  The doctor also asked that I keep track of what I eat to see if we can pinpoint what causes this.  He explained that if I do not figure this out or if the pills do not work then I get the joy of swallowing modern technology so that they can see my insides from the top down.  Really cutting edge stuff if you think about it but still I am finding it a little weird that I have to swallow a camera!

Now I know I just started it but by 10pm my stomach was killing me and I was so nausea it made me feel like the room was spinning (heck maybe it was)!  I put a patch on (oh those are the patches they gave me for nerve pain in my side after they took out my gallbladder).  It cuts the burning pain down on my side when my stomach starts hurting like that.  With that and some cuddling with the hubby I was able to fall asleep.  However every time I rolled on my side or stomach I woke up.  A restful night it was not.

Needless to say when I got up this morning it was with the thought - something has to give on this!  I am so sick of being sick (if I may be so clique)!  Now comes my bright idea for the day :)

I figured if my doctor wants me to track what I am eating I may as well do it right.  My bright idea is that I am starting all over - going back to the basics if you will.  I am going to start with fruit.  I will only eat fruit for a day or two.  If I can get my stomach to quit hurting while eating fruit then I will add that to the list of "hey I can eat that!".  If not I will eliminate it from my diet and start with vegetables and see if my stomach improves on that.  Once I find what I can eat I will only eat that for a few days to give my poor stomach a break.  Then I am going to slowly add foods one at a time to the diet and document if I am able to tolerate them or not.

Honestly at this point I do not know what else to do.  I am just so tired of not feeling well.  As sad as it is my only goal right now is to go a week without feeling bad.  Just a week - not a month not a year - ONE WEEK!

I can only hope that my journey is going to help someone out there who is also trying to heal themselves spiritually, physically and emotionally.

Monday, October 12, 2009

Is God first in YOUR life?

So it's 2am and I am up.  I do this alot.  I am up when people sleep and sleep when people are up.  It's getting to be a horrible habit.  When I am up like this I think of my mom.  She used to be up alot too and sleep during the day.  I used to get frustrated for her sleeping so much.... now well now I know why she did it and I wish I could talk to her and say I am sorry for getting so mad at her.  But I can't so I do everything else.

 I have read half a book, caught up on my emails and been playing bejeweled for over an hour!  Mostly though I've been thinking about where God is in my life right now.  No I don't mean questioning if he's here or not but just thinking where I put him.  First, second....maybe even last.  I keep thinking that life is getting to be like bejeweled (I know a sign of a true addict) however it fits for this.

I am playing this game that only gives  you one minute to find the patterns and score high.  It goes fast and you are trying to find the patterns the right ones to move all before TIMES UP comes on your screen.  I begin to wonder am I missing something - did I pick the wrong one - why are others doing better at this than me. 

Then it hits me - this is my life.  It's going by so fast and I am just moving things around and working as fast as I can to get things done and BOOM TIMES UP!  Maybe that's what is wrong I am the one who is doing all the moving around - looking for the right path - you know just like in the game.  So I have to ask myself is God first in my life.  Well... I want  him to be, I mean him to be, but I guess the truth is no.

So the true questions is how do I change that?  See I can't do this alone (oh don't get me wrong I have a wonderful family who is always there to help) but ultimately if God is not first then you are doing it alone - don't kid yourself.  So how do I put God first?  Do I read my bible first thing in the morning?  Do I pray before every decision?  I do read the bible, I pray heck I pray alot!  So how come I do not feel like HE is first in my life?

I wish after several hours of comtemplating I could say I've figured it out... but I haven't.  I am still trying to figure it out. 

I'd love to hear your thoughts on this.....

Wednesday, October 7, 2009

Health from start to finish

So let's be honest here - I thought I'd just jump on the health bandwagon and viola I'd be on my way.  Apparently that is NOT how this works!  Since I last wrote I have been getting better, getting sick, getting worse and now we are back to getting better.

I just went to see my GI doctor this week and found out that my system is just not adapting to having my gallbladder out!  Well there's a thought - my body not following the rules!  To better understand this let me go back and catch you up.

I went on the pain free diet my arthritis doctor put me on.  It was tough to get used to but I did it!  I started eating better and watched my pain level drop tremendously!  Then about two weeks ago I started getting sick again.  I originally thought I had that stomach flu being passed around and waited it out a few days.  When I realized it was getting worse not better I went to see my regular doctor.  She put me on some antibotics and medicine for a possible ulcer. 

An ulcer?  What?  Well it wasn't a shock to me. I have been working obscene hours, not sleeping and worried about EVERYTHING!  So an ulcer made sense to me.  I decided to be a good girl and actually take the medicine this time - hey there is a first for everything!  After a week of medicine and no improvement I decided to go see my GI doctor on Monday.

First let me tell you.  I absolutely LOVE my GI doctor!  He is fabulous!  My son calls him the GI Whisperer!  So I go in - lay out the symptoms, tell him I am hardly eating and have lost 15 pounds.  He says I think your body is not adjusting to your gallbladder surgery.  He starts me out on an acid neutrilizer and then will eventually put me on another medication to help my body deal with the bile being dumped into my stomach.  I know - GROSS!  But hey I am just calling it like he says it :)

So I took the medicine and saw immediate response.  So now I have to try to get back on track health wise and back on my pain free diet.  Not easy since I went back to sweet tea and ice cream to get through the last two weeks! 

Now this seems pretty easy right - just get back to it - you did it once it should be easy to do again.  Well here is the issue - mmmmm I AM STARVING PEOPLE!  Two weeks of not eating!  Are you kidding me I want to go eat EVERYTHING in sight right now. 

Well it's 3am - not a good sign but hey it is what it is.  I am going to start back on eating right today.  Wish me luck and pray I don't eat the frigerator contents before the family wakes up!!!