Is God first in YOUR life?

So it's 2am and I am up.  I do this alot.  I am up when people sleep and sleep when people are up.  It's getting to be a horrible habit.  When I am up like this I think of my mom.  She used to be up alot too and sleep during the day.  I used to get frustrated for her sleeping so much.... now well now I know why she did it and I wish I could talk to her and say I am sorry for getting so mad at her.  But I can't so I do everything else.

 I have read half a book, caught up on my emails and been playing bejeweled for over an hour!  Mostly though I've been thinking about where God is in my life right now.  No I don't mean questioning if he's here or not but just thinking where I put him.  First, second....maybe even last.  I keep thinking that life is getting to be like bejeweled (I know a sign of a true addict) however it fits for this.

I am playing this game that only gives  you one minute to find the patterns and score high.  It goes fast and you are trying to find the patterns the right ones to move all before TIMES UP comes on your screen.  I begin to wonder am I missing something - did I pick the wrong one - why are others doing better at this than me. 

Then it hits me - this is my life.  It's going by so fast and I am just moving things around and working as fast as I can to get things done and BOOM TIMES UP!  Maybe that's what is wrong I am the one who is doing all the moving around - looking for the right path - you know just like in the game.  So I have to ask myself is God first in my life.  Well... I want  him to be, I mean him to be, but I guess the truth is no.

So the true questions is how do I change that?  See I can't do this alone (oh don't get me wrong I have a wonderful family who is always there to help) but ultimately if God is not first then you are doing it alone - don't kid yourself.  So how do I put God first?  Do I read my bible first thing in the morning?  Do I pray before every decision?  I do read the bible, I pray heck I pray alot!  So how come I do not feel like HE is first in my life?

I wish after several hours of comtemplating I could say I've figured it out... but I haven't.  I am still trying to figure it out. 

I'd love to hear your thoughts on this.....